is a Self-fulfilling Prophecy
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces,
never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again.
The greatest limitations
you will ever face will be those you place on yourself.
weakness and strength, purity and impurity, are his own and
not another man's. They are brought about by himself and not
by another; and they can only be altered by himself, never
by another. His condition is also his own, and not another
man's. His sufferings and his happiness are evolved from within.
How often it is
we find ourselves attempting to change someone elses
life. Usually its someone close to us --- someone we
hold near and dear like a spouse, a child or a sibling. Our
intentions are generally good and aimed at making life better
for someone we care about.
But, oh, how next
to impossible it is to control someone elses life. And
so painful!! That most of our suffering in relationships is
tied to the failure of other people to meet our expectations;
of them failing to do what we think is right for them (or
that satisfies us).
I have been helping
my 10-year-old, who will be in Primary 5 this year. My experience
and knowledge suggests a path for her that I think best utilizes
her talents and gifts. But it is not a path that she may want
to pursue and no amount of persuasion on my part might
change that. It would be frustrating and somewhat painful
for me to deal with that. As parents, we always want
the best for our children at least what we think is
However, as my
child grows older -eventually I must allow my child to go
down the path she will choose, with full knowledge that her
condition is her own, and not anyone else's. And that
ultimately her sufferings and her happiness are evolved
from within. While I can offer her advice, my best help
will be by becoming the best example I can be of.
We can directly
measure our progress down our path by how detached we can
become when the direction of another's life conflicts with
what we think is best for them. When we can act with the assurance
that they must follow their own path just as we must follow
ours, we will have taken a great leap in our personal growth.
Should we have
high expectations of those who are close to us? Absolutely!
a self-fulfilling prophecy. You may not get what you want,
but in the long run you will get what you expect. So
how do we handle it when others dont do as wed
like? Love them for what they choose to be regardless
of your opinion about what they should choose to be.